What motivates you?

      Motives are essential, and questionable……
Why do I do what I do, and say what I say? Is a question that has been whirling around my head recently. I have been bombarded with challenges and oppurtunities that seem to be coming at me from all angles. Its a little overwhelming, and some of the advice that I have been given seems to just add to the confusion. 
   I think that it is important for me to dive into the “true” me, and where that truth comes from! 
   As I sit and think about where God has me, and a deep longing for change, I can’t help but really dive into motives. I really think that motives are something that I should be looking into frequently, in some cases, no wait!, in ALL cases, I am a bit afraid of what I am going to learn. 
   Part of me fears the exposure of what may rise to the surface through all of this, but as I too often forget, that with the exposure comes freedom and truth. Not freedom of responsibility but the freedom of not having to cloak my garbage. I can’t speak for you, but I have a ton of garbage that I try to cover up and it stinks! Literally and figuratively! 
   I have always had this overwhelming desire to be transparent with myself and with others, but I have felt this constant push to keep to myself and not let anyone in. To just let people in on the surface and go about my life without ever having to be “burdened” with having to open up to someone. Or even worse, little white lies that deflect the truth of who I am or the motives behind my actions or thoughts.
   Not all of out motives are bad, but lets face it, we all sometimes say yes to someone when they ask us to do something that we really don’t want to do for fear that: “what if I have to ask them for something down the road?”.  (Do you see the motive in this?) At least I am guilty of this. What I am getting at here is that, I need to really take a look inside my life to see what rules me and the things I do, and then the question comes “will I really appreciate how utterly remarkable it is to be free and true?” 
 What would you say or how would you feel, if someone was so honest, that it offended you?

2 thoughts on “What motivates you?

  1. Alex

    Personally, honesty can never offend me.
    I can admit that I’ve had plenty of thoughts in my own head that are totally offensive, repulsive, obscene, you name it. However, I’ve also had thoughts that were incredibly beautiful, complex, true and honest. I believe that this is more or less what everyone is like. We’re all these big messes. We’re all over the place! The only shameful part is that we learn to hide the parts of ourselves that we are afraid of, or that we’re sensitive about.
    I find it totally refreshing when someone speaks their mind frankly to me, without trying to hide or whitewash any of their feelings. Even if they’re saying something that on the surface seems mean, degrading, or impolite, I think I would always rather hear someone’s true feelings than a more polite yet dishonest version of those feelings.
    My only caveat is that I do think being honest is different than simply “saying whatever’s on your mind”. I know I have lots of thoughts that are impulsive or reactionary, and those thoughts don’t necessarily define how I truly feel about anything. So it’s most important to first be honest with yourself, to acknowledge what you truthfully feel beneath the surface of your fleeting thoughts, and to come to terms with that. THEN you share your feelings with others, once you understand (at least a little bit) how you feel yourself.

    1. forgottenskymusic Post author

      Alex, Beautifully written!
      Thank your for sharing your thoughts on this. I would have to agree with you 100%.
      These are some of the very same thoughts that I have begun to accept and implement through my reflection on things. I feel like some of my best friends, have always been the ones that have been very honest and transparent with me. Even if it hurts, its better than being lied to.
      I also agree that not everything that comes to mind should be blurted out. Like you said, not all of our thoughts define what it is that we truly feel, or think. Good things to ponder my friend!


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