Tag Archives: neurotic

What’s Next?

Whats next?

In everyday life, I am super busy, too busy in fact.
Sometimes I am so busy I feel a little neurotic, and that seems to be the culture these days. Cram as much as you can into your day so you can feel accomplished, or important or what ever we need to feel worthy.
   While on vacation two weeks ago, I was able to stop and hear the trees sway back and forth, the leaves shake in unison as a breeze gently plucked them into a dance, hear and see the waves come crashing onto the beach. I couldn’t help but slow down.
     However, my thoughts and body began to get antsy for the “next thing”. I had a hard time slowing down, which is something I am encouraged to do almost daily, by people who are close to me.
   I seem to suffer from a common ailment in our society, what I call “whats next?”.  I exhibit impatience, dissatisfaction, hurriedness etc. As a result, my family suffers, my relationships suffer, my job suffers and my psyche suffers. I am not as close to people or God as I want to be, or should be for that matter. I am so tired of living this way.
    My job requires me to “herd” people into telling me what they need in as few words as possible and in as little time as possible. It’s commission based and you have to work as quickly and efficiently as you can. That leaves no time for banter or chit-chat. The term “land the plane” gets tossed around frequently. Sure, there is time for goofing off and blowing off steam but your mind is always on your next task.
    I used to say that I was really good at multitasking, but over the last few months, I have realized that I AM TERRIBLE AT IT!  In fact, I suck at it!!!. If I am having a conversation with someone and pick up my phone to check something, I completely lose my focus on the conversation. At this point, the relationship has suffered,  and the other person may be hurt, and they have a right to be, but we are so accustomed to this type of behavior that we deem it socially acceptable. No time is sacred anymore.
      I don’t want to trudge through life intentionally or unintentionally ignoring people because I am so busy trying to accomplish what I “need” to get done.
    I can’t help but look at Jesus; this dude was busy, and had a genuine agenda to accomplish, but he healed, broke bread, fed, taught, challenged, and discipled real people day after day, willingly, lovingly and graciously. He was more human than I will ever be.
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